Recent straw poll puts Chester at 0%

DEMOCRATIC REPUBLIC OF CINNAMON CREEK – A recent straw poll held in the Democratic Republic of Cinnamon Creek in the run up to the General Secretary elections will make incredibly unpleasant reading for the Henry Chester campaign.

Henry Chester, the hawkish, anti-UT candidate who currently serves as Minister of Health and Transportation, scored a grand total of 0 points in the most recent straw poll conducted in the DRCC. This put him behind second-placer Bella Topgrove, who came in at 33% (an increase of 7% in her poll numbers) and frontrunner for the LCP, Dallin Langford, who increased his control of the campaign trail by 8% to get to 66% of the vote.

Such even numbers (two thirds one way, one third the other) will possibly be latched onto by opponents of the current DRCC regime as evidence of suspicious activity within the government, though no out and out proof has come forward that the DRCC is anything other than what it appears.

Henry Chester, who’s pro-war and anti-UT rhetoric has so far failed to capture the hearts and minds of the electorate, will be exceedingly disheartened that not one person polled would choose to vote for him given the option. However, all hope may not be lost.

There is still a debate to come as well as a second straw-poll, according to General Secretary Langford, but if he loses them then he is, in Langford’s own words, “doomed”.


This poll will make exceedingly pleasant reading for the civil rights candidate, Bella Topgrove. Increasingly, she is being seen as the most plausible alternative to current frontrunner, Dallin Langford, and this straw poll certainly marks an increase in momentum of her campaign. It is now critical that she capitalizes on this in the upcoming debate and garners as much media attention as she possibly can, particularly in order to capture the vote of the honorary citizens of the DRCC, who are able to vote in conjunction with the inner and outer provinces.

Dallin Langford is still leading by a sizeable margin, and this may initially provide his campaign with evidence that he remains the legitimate leader of the country; however, Ms. Topgrove has been consistently increasing her proportion of the popular vote gradually since the beginning of the election cycle, and if she can keep this up, Mr. Langford may find himself in trouble.

It ultimately comes down to how the candidates perform at the debate. Here’s the ways it could pan out, listed in order of likelihood (in our consideration):

1) Dallin Langford cements his position as frontrunner
Considering the recent pattern of the campaign, in all probability, he will most likely retain the momentum he has gained throughout. Despite a number of controversies in his past and the uncertainty of the Eden v Langford potential civil proceedings, his popularity continues to grow exponentially as the election continues. A good showing at the debate would go a long way to enshrining himself in the top spot.

2) Bella Topgrove comes out of the woodwork
Bella Topgrove has shown herself to be something of a foil in this election; her isolationist foreign policy may strike a chord with voters in the DRCC in the light of a recent slew of controversy, including the UT and Loquntian cases Mr. Langford has been involved in. If she can capitalize on Mr. Langford’s weaknesses and numerous controversies during the debate, she may see a sharp increase in her poll numbers.

3) Henry Chester recovers, splits the Topgrove vote, and gives victory to Langford
Henry Chester and Bella Topgrove are, despite Ms. Topgrove’s recent successes, still mostly “also-rans” in comparison to the LCP frontrunner. Furthermore, considering Mr. Langford’s middle-of-the-road approach to most issues, foreign policy included, it is more likely that voters who align themselves with Ms. Topgrove’s hardcore isolationism will be more likely to be won over by an extremist foreign policy than a cautious one. If Henry Chester posts a solid debate result, Topgrove could see her rising poll numbers shattered and returned to the situation prior to the last straw poll.

4) Henry Chester recovers and dethrones Topgrove as second-placer
This is the least likely result, all things considered; first of all, Chester’s unpopularity makes it unlikely that he will be able to remove Ms. Topgrove, who’s recent successes in the polls show that she has a breadth of public support not attributed to the Chester campaign. However, if Henry Chester can somehow rein in his extremist rhetoric and show himself to be a more personable, reasonable candidate during the debate, it may well be that he can steal some of those voting for Mr. Langford and overtake Ms. Topgrove prior to the crucial straw poll that comes after.


Horatio Eden is Editor-in-chief of the Daily Micronational and Lord Executor of Valdsland. Mostly known for running a Minecraft let's play channel with two subs, which is the only organization he allows to advertise on the site.

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